The 7: Best Christmas Movies

It’s that wonderful time of the year again, which means I’m gonna piss you all off with my Top 7 Christmas Movies list by purposefully leaving off what I believe is the most overrated movie of all time. A Christmas Story will never be on this list for me. Maybe it’s the audacity of Ted Turner to play the movie for 24 hours straight. Perhaps it’s the fact that I’ve watched it 2 times and never laughed once. While knowing this might alienate readers and have them close the page, I think the rest of my list is very much valid.

  1. Die Hard– Cliche? Yes. Die Hard wins many popularity contests during the holidays as the best Christmas movie of all time. Naysayers be warned, if you try to tell me that Die Hard is not a Christmas movie I will slap you in the face. A) The entire film takes place at a Christmas Eve Party. B) “Santa Clause” makes an appearance. C) There are Christmas Carols (RUN-DMC!). D) The phrase “Ho, Ho, Ho” is uttered twice. A Holiday Classic. Did You Know? Alan Rickman (Hans Gruber) made his feature film debut in Die Hard.
  2. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation– There is 1 film that is always a welcome sight at my family’s Christmas Eve party; this is that film. There are so many hilarious moments in this movie that I’d need a whole post to discuss them. By far the best Chevy Chase film ever and by far the best performance of his career by Randy Quaid. No matter how dysfunctional your family is, they don’t hold a candle to the Griswolds. Did You Know? Chevy Chase wears the same Chicago Bears cap throughout all four Vacation movies.
  3. Elf– I remember when this movie first came out on DVD, Chesh and I probably watched it at least 5 times in a week, leading Jeffrey to drink a lot. I was always worried the magic of Elf would wear off, but I still find myself stopping the channel surfing to catch a few hilarious minutes. Director Jon Favreau cemented his spot as one of the up-and-coming directors with the help of Will Ferrell in the best performance of his career. I can’t wait to share this movie with Lucy when she’s older. Did You Know? The original screenplay was made in 1993 and was originally starring Jim Carrey.
  4. Love Actually– Leave it to the Brits to bring us the epitome ensemble film that has sprouted copycats (Valentine’s Day, He’s Just Not That Into You). Love Actually is not only a great Christmas movie, but it’s one of the best Chick Flicks of all-time. It’s a rarity for a romantic comedy to be enjoyed by the majority of men who are forced to watch it at first. It’s also probably one of the first Chick Flicks that guys will suggest to watch with a lady friend. Did You Know? Love Actually was the most rented DVD in the UK in 2004.
  5. Home Alone– A childhood favorite which, as we found out at the Swartz Christmas Party, actually holds up now as an adult. I still think it would be a blast to be a kid left home alone and be forced to defend your house against 2 bumbling burglars. “Look what you did you little jerk”. I bet you utter a quote from Home Alone at least once a week. Did You Know? Robert DeNiro turned down the role of Harry.
  6. The Muppet Christmas Carol– One of the most beloved stories is told by one of the most beloved franchises as Kermit, Miss Piggy and the gang join Michael Caine in the telling of Scrooge. Another film I look forward to sharing with Lucy. Did You Know? The film marked the first time that Kermit was not voiced by Jim Henson, as he had recently passed away.
  7. White Christmas– This pick is for the wife, as this is her favorite Christmas movie ever. I won’t lie, it was enjoyable and I found myself liking it a lot more than I thought I would. Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye were an amazing duo and played off each other with such ease and flair. An actual Classic that’s worth a watch. Did You Know? The train scene had to be shot at Fox, the only studio to house a standing train set.
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