Thrirdand7 Hates The Raiders

Thirdand7 Note: We will be taking unnecessary shots at each of the Seahawk opponents this season prior to kick off.  This week the ‘Hawks play our former AFC West rival, the Oakland Raiders.  I couldn’t resist this chance.  I grew up hating the Raiders more than Fleetwood Mac and Barney.  It’s preseason for wannabe bloggers too right?

Preseason Week 4  Seattle Seahawks vs Oakland Raiders.

Dear Raiders,

You are the taint of the NFL and society.  The only thing you have ever provided our community in a beneficial way was the nickname that my high school later adopted.  The rest of your existence has been a disgrace.

Yes Al Davis was a pioneer and helped merge the NFL with the AFL.  But the history books don’t tell you what an asshole he is.  Half the 1970’s were spent dressing like a drag queen.  Look at him now… he’s not even human.  His face is falling off!  He’s a zombie!  Why the US government hasn’t put him down to prevent the zombie apocalypse I’ll never understand.  You’ve been warned.

To the Raider Nation I’ll say this… I don’t feel sorry that you are handicapped by a zombie owner.  You fans have taken the bad boy persona waaaaay too far.  Yes Ice Cube probably helped ruin your image.  I give him a pass for this because he created a song as good as wonderful as “Today Was A Good Day,”.  ‘Cube can do no wrong.  (Except his acting career after “Next Friday”…  There’s no excuse for that, besides piles of cash) Back to my point… Oakland Raider fans are about as classy as a meth addicted hooker at a 5 star restaurant.  One d-bag even tried to pick a fight with my mom in the Kingdome in ’99.  His pathetic posturing came to a halt when he saw a 16 year old Jeffrey, post puberty, looking to beat the hell out of a grown ass man for the first time.  We won the game by one point and my mother wanted to find the guy to rub it in his face.

So this Friday night fresh off starting brawls in the stands in San Francisco and shooting people in the parking lots, the Raiders will be infiltrating Seahawk Stadium with their stench, machismo, and all around craptastic attitudes.  You aren’t welcome here.  I will sadly not be going to this game as I can think of a thousand better ways to get shot. So to the Raiders I leave you with this, good luck with Terrelle Pryor, Darrius Heyward Bey, and your 90th (roughly) coach in 10 years.  I’m sorry we no longer have to kick your ass twice a year like in the old AFC West days.  Enjoy your drive back to White Center after the game.

Sincerely, Jeffrey, Angry ‘Hawks Fans, & Your Week 4 Opponent.


One thought on “Thrirdand7 Hates The Raiders

  1. That is truly the most frightening picture I’ve ever seen. I shall be using it with the children to show them the affects of the below:

    -PreMarital Sex
    -Listening to Creed

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